Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

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We once roamed the vast forums of Corona Coming Attractions. Some of us had been around from The Before Times, in the Days of Excelsior, while others of us had only recently begun our trek. When our home became filled with much evil, including the villainous Cannot-Post-in-This-Browser and the dreaded Cannot-Log-In, we flounced away most huffily to this new home away from home. We follow the flag of Jubboiter and talk about movies, life, the universe, and everything, often in a most vulgar fashion. All are welcome here, so long as they do not take offense to our particular idiom.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God »

"Greeks" covers both fraternities and sororities.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by Dalty »

I don't understand these fraternities. Why do they exist? Where did they come from? How are they funded? Why are they all called Gamma Hydra Wombat and other stupid names?
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God »

My father was in a fraternity and my mother was in a sorority. That's how they met. If it weren't for the existence of Sigma Nu and Delta Zeta, I wouldn't exist. That said, I'm not too keen on fraternities and sororities.

It's been my experience that fraternities exist mainly to give those who are willing and able to pay a hefty sum (sometimes approaching half the cost of tuition) easy access to social and business advantages. Camaraderie is pretty much enforced, so you're also buying your way into a network of ready-made friends. It can also inculcate in its members a sense of privilege and elitism. This sense really gets inflated when they live on campus in the fraternity house. These houses often have a cook and what's essentially a maid (I don't think they call them this outright; I think they have some other title for them) on staff.

The Greeks dominate the student body elections and take an active role in shaping regulations to their favor. (This is occasionally done by illicit means, though they don't necessarily always have to cheat, since they all get together before the elections to decide on which candidates they are going to push through. They then only run one Greek per position, and every single Greek votes for that specific candidate.) Every fraternity has a huge bank of test answers for various professors, and the kids in those fraternities go out of their way to take those classes.

The Greek system has a history of hazing its members. The spoken reason for this is that it strengthens the bonds of the members. Every member of a specific fraternity chapter had to go through a specific initiation routine, it is reasoned, so the experience they share with their brothers is an experience they share with no one else. It's genuine solidarity, I suppose, but it's also forced and incredibly childish. It also frees them up to think they've "earned" their privilege because they "went through" some mild hardship.

It's been my experience that sororities exist to give women easier access to fraternity men. The Greek network is pretty insular. They may socialize with non-Greek students, but they tend not to seek a deeper connection with a person unless that person is also a part of the Greek system. The insularity can even be intra-insular. My mother and father met specifically because Sigma Nu took declared Delta Zeta their official "Little Sisters" that year. (This is its own thing. It's Googleable, if you really want to know more about it. I think it is an older practice that has since been discontinued by many fraternities.) It is often joked that women join sororities in pursuance of their "MRS" degrees.

I had one friend going into my freshmen year at the University of Alabama. We met the summer between our junior and senior years in high school. We were both in the Rural Health Scholars Program. We spent pretty much all our free time together. He pledged to a fraternity (Kappa Alpha Psi, if you were wondering) after his first semester. We hung out less and less, and then not at all. He brought me to the fraternity house once. I made the mistake of being myself. He was clearly embarrassed. I didn't wear Birkenstocks, khaki shorts, a backwards baseball cap, or a pink Polo shirt with a popped collar. I didn't have encyclopedic knowledge of Phish. I didn't call beers "brewskies."

I should clarify what I mean when I say it's "been my experience." I went to the University of Alabama, and the fraternity system at the University of Alabama is famous for its corruption. It's called "The Machine," and it has its own Wikipedia entry. It's a corruption that extends beyond the university and into local, non-university politics. It could very well be that anyone who was ever a part of a fraternity outside of the University of Alabama would say that any condemnation on my part shows bias and ignorance. This person might even be right. The fraternities at Washington University in St. Louis didn't seem all that bad in comparison, and they led to National Lampoon's Animal House. I'm not super-crazy about it, but I think it's a decent movie.

If, on the other hand, anyone who was ever a part of a University of Alabama fraternity calls bullshit on me, I would tell them to stuff it. They've done too much bad to pretend they haven't. If they don't see it, it's because they are lying to themselves. (Granted, some U of A fraternities are worse than others.)

My mother looks back on her years in the sorority as a waste of time and money. When she graduated, she severed ties completely. My father was the opposite. For him, the fraternity was serious fucking business. Even after he graduated, he continued to fly back to his home university to go to games and hang out with fraternity kids. He even continued to dump money on them when he had no money to dump.

When I say kids, I mean it. I'm talkin' eighteen-year-olds and shit. He was still doing this right up until he died. His "celebration of life" was held by the fraternity. I think some of his ashes are going to be buried on the grounds. I had to listen to kids too young to grow a full mustache talk about how he was a father figure to them. Well, shit. I'm glad he was a father figure to somebody.

It seems the fraternity was more important to my father, even, than the military--and he was an Army Ranger. You don't become an Army Ranger unless you're pretty dedicated to the service.

I'm sure my father would have a counter for everything I said above. I don't know how good these counters would be. The best he could do to counter it when we'd talk about it was to say that 1.) I'd just never understand, and 2.) I shouldn't hold other fraternities' transgressions against his specific chapter. I guess. *He* was never on *my* side of it, though. I don't think it's a stretch to say that his side was the more privileged side. That doesn't make me wrong and him right, of course. He doesn't understand. I don't understand. There. It's all cancelled out.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God »

My father would also point toward the "good" the fraternities did, money- and labor-wise, for the community. There's that, I guess. The Mafia can make similar claims. It doesn't make the Mafia a stand-up institution. From the outside, it looked to me like any good fraternities did was somehow self-serving.

Not surprisingly, my father pushed for me to join Sigma Nu. It would have been easier for me than most, since I would have been a "legacy." They pretty much have to take the kids of former members.

If I had joined, maybe I would be able to say that my father was like a father to me. My loss, I guess.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God »

Jubbers just told me that it was "sad" that I continue to go on about my daddy issues.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by Dalty »

But none of this explains the 'why'?
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God »

I thought that was the only question of yours I actually answered.
It's been my experience that fraternities exist mainly to give those who are willing and able to pay a hefty sum (sometimes approaching half the cost of tuition) easy access to social and business advantages.
It's been my experience that sororities exist to give women easier access to fraternity men.
Of course, this is only the "why" from my point of view.

Wikipedia has cut-and-dried answers for "where" and "how," so I didn't bother. It also explains why they use Greek letters.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by Dalty »

You..... expect...... me....... to..... .????
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God »

No, Mr. Bags, I expect you to don't.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by Dalty »

It's a very weird bag of strangeness, you must admit. Big houses on a campus, with silly Greek names, with all the rush week and the hazing and stuff.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God »

I don't know if I consider it strange. I consider it pretty dumb, but I don't consider it strange. It makes a lot of sense to me--the same way all kinds of fucked-up shit makes a lot of sense to me.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by Dalty »

Wait. Does Manga make sense to you?
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God »

Yes. You're probably reading it backwards.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by Dalty »

Maybe I need to turn in my geek card.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God »

Right to left. That's the manga way.

Unless the US publisher flips it for the Western audience's benefit.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by Dalty »

Manga Agatha Christie is one hell of a disappointment.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God »

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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by Dalty »

No sexual offenders register in Alabama?
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by Adam54 »

Those who aren't sexual offenders register. Saves a lot of paperwork.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by Dalty »

Alabama.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God »

Adam's comment coaxed the day's first smile out of me.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God »

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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by Dalty »

That headline tries to make you jump to a conclusion that just isn't apparently true.
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God »

Or at least that's what the police department wants you to believe. It's a helluva lot less of a hassle for them if the murder isn't motivated by prejudice.

Then again, it may not be motivated by prejudice. WE MAY NEVER KNOW!
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Re: Alabama, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Post by Dalty »

Less paperwork if not hate crime!!
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