Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

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We once roamed the vast forums of Corona Coming Attractions. Some of us had been around from The Before Times, in the Days of Excelsior, while others of us had only recently begun our trek. When our home became filled with much evil, including the villainous Cannot-Post-in-This-Browser and the dreaded Cannot-Log-In, we flounced away most huffily to this new home away from home. We follow the flag of Jubboiter and talk about movies, life, the universe, and everything, often in a most vulgar fashion. All are welcome here, so long as they do not take offense to our particular idiom.
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Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God » January 19th, 2014, 9:29 pm

Here's the thread where Dalty distracts himself from thinking about his ding-dong 24/7 and delivers unto us some real sea monster movie knowledge.

He does this in an essayistic-yet-loose fashion. He posts when he feels like it. He posts when new thoughts occur to him.

He tells us a little about his past. He tells us why he's become an armchair sea monster movie expert. He tells us what makes a good one and what makes a bad one. He gives us recommendations. He tells us about his dream sea monster movie--that is, the one he wishes will some day be made.

With each new post, it becomes clearer and clearer to us that he's not just talking about sea monster movies. He's talking about life.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Dalty » January 20th, 2014, 12:13 am

In the middle of a very uncomfortable Saturday night, before being readmitted to the chop-house, on one of the lesser satellite channels I was honoured enough to revisit James Cameron's first movie as Director.

Piranha II: Flying Killers (or The Spawning, as you call it over there). Possibly the finest flying killer fish movie ever made.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Dalty » January 20th, 2014, 4:43 pm

So my English Teacher / Head of Media friend tells me she lets her class study Jaws. She says they talk about the symbology of 3 in the movie, and the colour yellow.

As a self confessed Jaws nerd I was surprised by this, as I was not aware of it. I know about the choice of primary colours in the palette to make the sea seem more bleak and show up the red.

Anyone else heard of this yellow / 3 symbology thing? Or is it just academics inventing shit to make themselves feel more academic-y ?

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Mal Shot First » January 20th, 2014, 4:58 pm

I wonder how Fake Strider would respond.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Dalty » January 20th, 2014, 5:25 pm

I wonder.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Thurston McQ » January 20th, 2014, 5:43 pm

Academics can come up with some of the dumbest shit.

Goiter did talk about Room 237 on Corona, right? That's the one that presents various "scholarly" takes on Kubrick's The Shining. It's on Netflix. It's hard to tell if the movie, itself, is supporting any of these ideas. There's a chance it was just presenting them without comment.

It's worth a watch, if only to expose yourself to the crazy.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God » January 21st, 2014, 8:58 pm


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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Mal Shot First » January 21st, 2014, 9:02 pm

Goddamn, that movie looks stupid.

The guy playing the sheriff looks a bit like Gary Cole.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Quasar » January 21st, 2014, 9:51 pm

The best part has to be how the sharks swim through snow that's obviously only a couple of inches deep.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Dalty » January 22nd, 2014, 3:05 am

Well done Goiter. Even Shark Attack 3 didn't manage to ruin sharks forever, but you found a movie that managed it. Good job!

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Dalty » January 25th, 2014, 1:03 pm

OK, so watching Jaws as it's on TV. Estuary victim just done, floaty leg and all.

It strikes me that this film doesn't really seem to have a conventional 3 act structure. It's just got 2 distinct acts, Amity and the hunt at sea.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Dalty » January 25th, 2014, 1:34 pm

Also, I think my favourite shot in all movies is in this film.

It's when the fish has just sounded with 3 barrels, shortly after it pulls the rear cleats off the Orca. They are talking about how the shark can't stay under with 3 barrels, then the 3 barrels dissappear.

It is very quiet for a few seconds, just long enough, then the whole Orca gets pushed sideways through the water listing right over and the shot is taken from the tip of the mast as the shark emerges from underneath the boat and you see the whole animal just below the surface. Great shot, perfect framing, perfect execution.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Dalty » January 25th, 2014, 2:07 pm

SPOILER

I am glad about Hooper. Originally it wasn't going to end so well for him, as per the book. However they tried to shoot the cage scenes with a midget diver in a little cage to make the real Great White they used in certain shots look bigger. The shark got tangled in the mechanism (footage still in the film) and the midget diver, with little tanks, burned through his air in terror and nearly died. He refused to go back in the cage to shoot the rest of the scene as scripted so they had to re-write it.

Like quite a lot else in this film, the adversity and issues helped towards the final product.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Dalty » January 26th, 2014, 7:14 am

I feel bad putting this in the same thread as a Jaws discussion.

[youtube]http://youtu.be/j28u-qlolC4[/youtube]

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Dalty » January 26th, 2014, 7:15 am

Hmmm, I fear I have run out of technology.

http://youtu.be/j28u-qlolC4

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Jubbers » January 26th, 2014, 8:07 am

You just put the "j28u-qlolC4" in there, and leave out the rest of the address.


Code: Select all

[youtube]j28u-qlolC4[/youtube]

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Dalty » January 26th, 2014, 12:12 pm

Aha!

Then, behold the awfulness!!

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God » January 26th, 2014, 1:37 pm

At some point, we should get a movie about human-shark hybrid foot soldiers. It would be called Shark and Awe, of course. There also ought to be a shark porno called Hummerhead.

I get the feeling that all you need to sell a schlocky shark movie is a mildly amusing title.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God » January 26th, 2014, 1:40 pm

Also, shark cinema and its study ought to be referred to as "Megalodeon."

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God » January 26th, 2014, 1:41 pm

These are all dad jokes.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Dalty » January 26th, 2014, 2:08 pm

Dad. Why did you leave Mum?

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God » January 26th, 2014, 2:37 pm

There was a time when my mother and I were living in Alabama while my father was living at Fort Jackson. I was still young enough to be considered a newborn.

My father was sleeping with an army nurse during this time. He made it so that his quarters were joined to hers on base. My mother kept calling him at Fort Jackson and asking him when he wanted her to drive over to South Carolina. He had told her when he left for Fort Jackson that he would get a place very soon.

He would give her non-committal answers. It's no good for you to come up this soon, he said. I'm still looking for a place. I'm still on base. You'll be able to come soon. I just need to find a place cheap enough for me to afford on my salary. Et cetera.

She called and called. It was always the same story. Months passed. When I was roughly half a year old, she decided to call his commanding officer to ask what the deal was, and to see if he could help her find them a place. The CO wasn't even aware my father was married. The CO's wife found a place, my mother packed all her worldly possessions into the car (yours truly included), and drove six hours to be with my father. My father was reportedly really pissy with her for calling his CO.

My father continued to invent reasons to stay on base. My mother got a teaching job pretty quickly. She's told me she saw him no more than one or two nights a week, and sometimes for no longer than a few hours. He and my mother were separated within three months' time.

According to my mother, my eventual stepfather (my first, but not my last) was the one guy who stood up for my mother this one time my father was making fun of her in front of her and his officer friends. My eventual stepfather was but a lowly sergeant, so he could have gotten into some real trouble for his small act of decency.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Dalty » January 26th, 2014, 3:46 pm

Too soon?

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by The Swollen Goiter of God » January 26th, 2014, 4:47 pm

Nah. It's been thirty-four years.

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Re: Dalty's Sea Monster Movie Aquarium

Post by Dalty » January 27th, 2014, 4:38 am

39 years since Jaws, nearly.

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