He's an articulate man from the South, he has a beard, and he's pretty much exactly my size. It's like you're friends with him already!
The Pro Wrestling Thread
Forum rules
We once roamed the vast forums of Corona Coming Attractions. Some of us had been around from The Before Times, in the Days of Excelsior, while others of us had only recently begun our trek. When our home became filled with much evil, including the villainous Cannot-Post-in-This-Browser and the dreaded Cannot-Log-In, we flounced away most huffily to this new home away from home. We follow the flag of Jubboiter and talk about movies, life, the universe, and everything, often in a most vulgar fashion. All are welcome here, so long as they do not take offense to our particular idiom.
We once roamed the vast forums of Corona Coming Attractions. Some of us had been around from The Before Times, in the Days of Excelsior, while others of us had only recently begun our trek. When our home became filled with much evil, including the villainous Cannot-Post-in-This-Browser and the dreaded Cannot-Log-In, we flounced away most huffily to this new home away from home. We follow the flag of Jubboiter and talk about movies, life, the universe, and everything, often in a most vulgar fashion. All are welcome here, so long as they do not take offense to our particular idiom.
- The Swollen Goiter of God
- Postapocalypse Survivor - 7510 Posts
- Posts: 8906
- Joined: January 9th, 2014, 8:46 pm
- Location: St. Louis
- Mal Shot First
- Wall of Text Climber - 2500 Posts
- Posts: 2733
- Joined: January 10th, 2014, 5:05 pm
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
Did he bray at you?
- Adam54
- Wall of Text Climber - 2500 Posts
- Posts: 3506
- Joined: January 9th, 2014, 10:13 pm
- Location: Eden Prairie, Minnesota
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
Ask me how many puns he made when we spoke.The Swollen Goiter of God wrote: ↑March 18th, 2017, 9:17 amHe's an articulate man from the South, he has a beard, and he's pretty much exactly my size. It's like you're friends with him already!
- The Swollen Goiter of God
- Postapocalypse Survivor - 7510 Posts
- Posts: 8906
- Joined: January 9th, 2014, 8:46 pm
- Location: St. Louis
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
I bet there were a few. It's likely you just didn't catch 'em, though, since they were delivered orally. Textual Goits and Oral Goits are two different beasts.
- Master Skywalker
- Money Bag Polisher - 100 Posts
- Posts: 181
- Joined: April 20th, 2015, 1:47 pm
- Location: A Galaxy far, far away
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
Damn! That's awesome! Where'd you meet him and what did you say?
On December 20, 2019, the Greatest Saga Ever... concludes.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
May the Force be with you
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
May the Force be with you
- The Swollen Goiter of God
- Postapocalypse Survivor - 7510 Posts
- Posts: 8906
- Joined: January 9th, 2014, 8:46 pm
- Location: St. Louis
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
He met him in the bathroom, and he said, "Before you speak, you should know that I'm unhinged and that if I hear you utter even the tiniest of puns, I will utterly come apart at the seams. So don't speak, and let me remember you this way. Oh, and just to allay any fears, I'm not wearing any concealed weapon of any kind about my person, so you don't have to worry about humoring my request out of fear. No. You'd only be humoring me out of respect. Again, no concealed weapons. Do you understand? If you do, just, like, continue not saying anything. Good. My god, you respect me! You really respect me! I shall remember this day forever and ever! You've... you've shown me the light, Bray Wyatt. No! NO! It's not what you think! I was speaking in earnest, and not making some kind of reference to your lantern. No, no. I realize that such a reference wouldn't have been a pun and that I am still clean of mind and of spirit. OK. Good. Good chat. I'm going to back out of your stall ever so slowly, but I'm not going to try to shoot or threaten you with the pistol that I'm not concealing. Thank you. Thank you ever so much. Thank you for your stony, respectful, light-showing silence."
- Master Skywalker
- Money Bag Polisher - 100 Posts
- Posts: 181
- Joined: April 20th, 2015, 1:47 pm
- Location: A Galaxy far, far away
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
Where's my damn Orson Welles applauding gif?The Swollen Goiter of God wrote: ↑March 21st, 2017, 2:46 pm He met him in the bathroom, and he said, "Before you speak, you should know that I'm unhinged and that if I hear you utter even the tiniest of puns, I will utterly come apart at the seams. So don't speak, and let me remember you this way. Oh, and just to allay any fears, I'm not wearing any concealed weapon of any kind about my person, so you don't have to worry about humoring my request out of fear. No. You'd only be humoring me out of respect. Again, no concealed weapons. Do you understand? If you do, just, like, continue not saying anything. Good. My god, you respect me! You really respect me! I shall remember this day forever and ever! You've... you've shown me the light, Bray Wyatt. No! NO! It's not what you think! I was speaking in earnest, and not making some kind of reference to your lantern. No, no. I realize that such a reference wouldn't have been a pun and that I am still clean of mind and of spirit. OK. Good. Good chat. I'm going to back out of your stall ever so slowly, but I'm not going to try to shoot or threaten you with the pistol that I'm not concealing. Thank you. Thank you ever so much. Thank you for your stony, respectful, light-showing silence."
On December 20, 2019, the Greatest Saga Ever... concludes.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
May the Force be with you
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
May the Force be with you
- The Swollen Goiter of God
- Postapocalypse Survivor - 7510 Posts
- Posts: 8906
- Joined: January 9th, 2014, 8:46 pm
- Location: St. Louis
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
It's at home... washin' its tights!
- Dalty
- Vegeta-ble Slicer - 9001 Posts
- Posts: 9564
- Joined: January 11th, 2014, 5:28 am
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
Why not washing his home whilst wearing tights?
- The Swollen Goiter of God
- Postapocalypse Survivor - 7510 Posts
- Posts: 8906
- Joined: January 9th, 2014, 8:46 pm
- Location: St. Louis
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
Well, that's just silly.
- Adam54
- Wall of Text Climber - 2500 Posts
- Posts: 3506
- Joined: January 9th, 2014, 10:13 pm
- Location: Eden Prairie, Minnesota
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
He was at the Minneapolis Car Show, weirdly enough and it went exactly as Goiter said.Master Skywalker wrote: ↑March 21st, 2017, 9:47 amDamn! That's awesome! Where'd you meet him and what did you say?
Except that it actually went more like this, I walked up when he was commenting to some staff member about how fast the line was moving.
Adam: "No complaints out of me!"
Bray: "Right, man? How you doin'?"
Adam: "Doing good! Great to meet you, big fan!"
Bray: "Thanks brother, appreciate that. Great to meet you as well."
*pause for photo op. Dude's got a helluva firm handshake*
Adam: "Thanks for doing what you do, man." *touches THE REAL WWE CHAMPIONSHIP BELT that was sitting on the table* "Really happy to see you finally get this."
Bray: "Oh you and me both brother." *belly laugh* "Have a good rest of your night."
He then finished off the line, left for a while, and came back and wandered around the floor of the stadium with the rest of us just looking at cars.
Random Lady: *stunned* "Well are you just walking around down here like a real person?!"
Bray: *stunned she'd ask such a strange question* "Well I just really like cars!"
He posed for photos with anybody who asked, shook hands, talked to anybody who approached him and I could hear him laughing any where on the show floor. Great, great guy.
- Dalty
- Vegeta-ble Slicer - 9001 Posts
- Posts: 9564
- Joined: January 11th, 2014, 5:28 am
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
Was there any kayfebe?
- Mal Shot First
- Wall of Text Climber - 2500 Posts
- Posts: 2733
- Joined: January 10th, 2014, 5:05 pm
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
Is kayfebe a feeble attempt at kayfabe?
- The Swollen Goiter of God
- Postapocalypse Survivor - 7510 Posts
- Posts: 8906
- Joined: January 9th, 2014, 8:46 pm
- Location: St. Louis
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
"Get ready to Dwayne the swamp!" is a good line.
- Dalty
- Vegeta-ble Slicer - 9001 Posts
- Posts: 9564
- Joined: January 11th, 2014, 5:28 am
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
I'd vote for him. Also, US Politics is such a comedy circus he would probably win.
- Adam54
- Wall of Text Climber - 2500 Posts
- Posts: 3506
- Joined: January 9th, 2014, 10:13 pm
- Location: Eden Prairie, Minnesota
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
I'm going to WWE TLC in October in Minneapolis.
I've got an extra ticket with your name on it, Dimple!
I've got an extra ticket with your name on it, Dimple!
- Mal Shot First
- Wall of Text Climber - 2500 Posts
- Posts: 2733
- Joined: January 10th, 2014, 5:05 pm
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
I'm pretty sure Dalty gets enough TLC at home.
- The Swollen Goiter of God
- Postapocalypse Survivor - 7510 Posts
- Posts: 8906
- Joined: January 9th, 2014, 8:46 pm
- Location: St. Louis
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
They had to stop calling it "The Learning Channel," because all it shows now is shitty reality content, and the only thing anyone can learn from watching is how to be just the worst fucking sort of human imaginable.
- Mal Shot First
- Wall of Text Climber - 2500 Posts
- Posts: 2733
- Joined: January 10th, 2014, 5:05 pm
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
Hey, learnin' is learnin'.
- The Swollen Goiter of God
- Postapocalypse Survivor - 7510 Posts
- Posts: 8906
- Joined: January 9th, 2014, 8:46 pm
- Location: St. Louis
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
It's one quarter Learning and 1/4 Reality. The other half is Knowing.
G.I. JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEE!
G.I. JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEE!
- Dalty
- Vegeta-ble Slicer - 9001 Posts
- Posts: 9564
- Joined: January 11th, 2014, 5:28 am
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
October I will be in Vietnam visiting the in-laws with Dalty Jr for the first time.
If I come to a wrestling match with you Adam, can I be drunk?
If I come to a wrestling match with you Adam, can I be drunk?
- Mal Shot First
- Wall of Text Climber - 2500 Posts
- Posts: 2733
- Joined: January 10th, 2014, 5:05 pm
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
I think it would be an insult to wrestling if you weren't drunk.
Wasn't chugging beer Stone Cold Steve Austin's entire shtick?
Wasn't chugging beer Stone Cold Steve Austin's entire shtick?
- The Swollen Goiter of God
- Postapocalypse Survivor - 7510 Posts
- Posts: 8906
- Joined: January 9th, 2014, 8:46 pm
- Location: St. Louis
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
"Speak gruffly and carry a big shtick!" was his motto.
- neglet
- Shoots First - 1138 Posts
- Posts: 1199
- Joined: January 11th, 2014, 2:47 pm
- Location: Chicago
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
Is this an appropriate place to talk about "GLOW?" Because that show is awesome (binged it over two days) and I will never post in this thread otherwise.
- Mango
- Washer of the Tights - 250 Posts
- Posts: 302
- Joined: January 9th, 2014, 10:05 pm
Re: The Pro Wrestling Thread
"GLOW" is awesome, I mentioned it is the 'what are you watching' thread.
I thought for a show focusing on such an 'extreme' situation it felt really grounded, with interesting and believable characters.
Also, Zoya the Destroya is the best name ever.
I thought for a show focusing on such an 'extreme' situation it felt really grounded, with interesting and believable characters.
Also, Zoya the Destroya is the best name ever.