Dumb Lyrics
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We once roamed the vast forums of Corona Coming Attractions. Some of us had been around from The Before Times, in the Days of Excelsior, while others of us had only recently begun our trek. When our home became filled with much evil, including the villainous Cannot-Post-in-This-Browser and the dreaded Cannot-Log-In, we flounced away most huffily to this new home away from home. We follow the flag of Jubboiter and talk about movies, life, the universe, and everything, often in a most vulgar fashion. All are welcome here, so long as they do not take offense to our particular idiom.
We once roamed the vast forums of Corona Coming Attractions. Some of us had been around from The Before Times, in the Days of Excelsior, while others of us had only recently begun our trek. When our home became filled with much evil, including the villainous Cannot-Post-in-This-Browser and the dreaded Cannot-Log-In, we flounced away most huffily to this new home away from home. We follow the flag of Jubboiter and talk about movies, life, the universe, and everything, often in a most vulgar fashion. All are welcome here, so long as they do not take offense to our particular idiom.
- Quasar
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Dumb Lyrics
Carrie Underwood - All American Girl
Verse 1 is about a father who wanted a boy but got a girl, and then she ended up being his whole world
Verse 2 is about the girl now a teenager becoming the whole world of the high school quarterback.
Verse 3:
"And when they got married and decided to have one of their own
She said, "Be honest, tell me what you want?"
And he said, "Honey, you oughta know"
Oughta know what? That he wants a girl? I guess if she'd been following along with the song, she should know. Because it says "All American Girl" in the chorus.
Seriously, he loves his wife so he should want a girl? I guess jack-ass dad didn't love his wife, cuz he wanted a damn BOY!
Verse 1 is about a father who wanted a boy but got a girl, and then she ended up being his whole world
Verse 2 is about the girl now a teenager becoming the whole world of the high school quarterback.
Verse 3:
"And when they got married and decided to have one of their own
She said, "Be honest, tell me what you want?"
And he said, "Honey, you oughta know"
Oughta know what? That he wants a girl? I guess if she'd been following along with the song, she should know. Because it says "All American Girl" in the chorus.
Seriously, he loves his wife so he should want a girl? I guess jack-ass dad didn't love his wife, cuz he wanted a damn BOY!
- The Swollen Goiter of God
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
What he wants is to put his ding-dong up her butt. Obviously.
- Quasar
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
That makes sense.
- The Swollen Goiter of God
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
Here are some songs with lyrics so dumb it hurts:
They all share the belief that they're very deep. I ought to throw Rush's "Freewill" in there.
They all share the belief that they're very deep. I ought to throw Rush's "Freewill" in there.
- Quasar
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
You chose not to put Rush's "Freewill" in there, but you still made a choice.
- The Swollen Goiter of God
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
I'd give your comment a "like" or an "upvote," but it's not a feature we have. Maybe we can coax Jubbers into seeing if it's addable--unless it would make things look too cluttered. Jubbers doesn't like design clutter.
- Quasar
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
If we're judging songs that are too earnest, I'd put Chicago's "Look Away" in there. I just love how it gets uber dramatic with the music and vocals and belts out
"BUT IF YOU SEE ME WALKING BY, AND THE TEARS ARE IN MY EYES, look away, baby, look away
AND IF WE MEET ON THE STREETS SOMEDAY, AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY, look away, baby, look away"
I always imagine watching a video for the song with a couple walking along the street with the dramatic music crashing around, and some doofus looking into the camera with a single tear trickling down his face. I should look up the video, because it's probably exactly like that.
"BUT IF YOU SEE ME WALKING BY, AND THE TEARS ARE IN MY EYES, look away, baby, look away
AND IF WE MEET ON THE STREETS SOMEDAY, AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY, look away, baby, look away"
I always imagine watching a video for the song with a couple walking along the street with the dramatic music crashing around, and some doofus looking into the camera with a single tear trickling down his face. I should look up the video, because it's probably exactly like that.
- The Swollen Goiter of God
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
I don't mean to get us off-track.
I remember hearing this one insanely stupid lyric about Romeo and Juliet in a Taylor Swift song. I'll dig it up.
I remember hearing this one insanely stupid lyric about Romeo and Juliet in a Taylor Swift song. I'll dig it up.
- The Swollen Goiter of God
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
Found it:
'Cause you were Romeo;
I was a scarlet letter.
And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet."
Why was she a scarlet letter? Because maybe she had sex with the guy? That's a pretty simplistic reading of The Scarlet Letter. And it doesn't really mesh with Romeo an Juliet.
The lyric's a callback to an earlier lyric in the song where she says, "You were Romeo. You were throwing pebbles, and my daddy said, 'Stay away from Juliet!'"
So I guess the first time the father's telling the guy to stay away from his daughter because he's afraid he'll ruin her with his ding-dong, but then they guy and the daughter sneak off and he ruins her with his ding-dong. Later, even though the guy's already ruined her, her father's still telling him to stay away. I guess it kinda works. Still, it does The Scarlet Letter a disservice to boil it down into a simple tale of ruination. I mean, is the Swift song's protagonist also an adulteress? Does Swift know the meaning behind the actual letter worn in The Scarlet Letter?
It's almost like a teenager just threw the only two things she was made to read in high school at a wall to see if they would stick.
How old was Swift when she wrote the song? I'm going to guess she was seventeen or eighteen.
'Cause you were Romeo;
I was a scarlet letter.
And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet."
Why was she a scarlet letter? Because maybe she had sex with the guy? That's a pretty simplistic reading of The Scarlet Letter. And it doesn't really mesh with Romeo an Juliet.
The lyric's a callback to an earlier lyric in the song where she says, "You were Romeo. You were throwing pebbles, and my daddy said, 'Stay away from Juliet!'"
So I guess the first time the father's telling the guy to stay away from his daughter because he's afraid he'll ruin her with his ding-dong, but then they guy and the daughter sneak off and he ruins her with his ding-dong. Later, even though the guy's already ruined her, her father's still telling him to stay away. I guess it kinda works. Still, it does The Scarlet Letter a disservice to boil it down into a simple tale of ruination. I mean, is the Swift song's protagonist also an adulteress? Does Swift know the meaning behind the actual letter worn in The Scarlet Letter?
It's almost like a teenager just threw the only two things she was made to read in high school at a wall to see if they would stick.
How old was Swift when she wrote the song? I'm going to guess she was seventeen or eighteen.
- Jubbers
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
Done.The Swollen Goiter of God wrote:I'd give your comment a "like" or an "upvote," but it's not a feature we have. Maybe we can coax Jubbers into seeing if it's addable--unless it would make things look too cluttered. Jubbers doesn't like design clutter.
- The Swollen Goiter of God
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
The mother of all dumb lyrics:
The whole song's monumentally dumb, but the dumbest bit is this:
Fuckin' magnets!
How do they work?
And I don't want
to talk to a scientist.
Y'all motherfuckers lyin',
and gettin' me pissed!"
Since everyone already knows how stupid this song is, there's probably no reason to include it here. That said, no list of dumb lyrics should be without it.
The whole song's monumentally dumb, but the dumbest bit is this:
Fuckin' magnets!
How do they work?
And I don't want
to talk to a scientist.
Y'all motherfuckers lyin',
and gettin' me pissed!"
Since everyone already knows how stupid this song is, there's probably no reason to include it here. That said, no list of dumb lyrics should be without it.
- Mal Shot First
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
I'm gonna be lazy and say that most of Katy Perry's lyrics are pretty dumb.
- neglet
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
But her boo--I mean, her music is so bouncy!
- Mal Shot First
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
I guess I find her rhymes dumber than the actual content of her lyrics.
- Space Tycoon
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- Mal Shot First
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
"Breakfast at Tiffany's" by Deep Blue Something is a pretty dumb song. The whole premise is that this guy's girlfriend wants to break up with him because they have nothing in common and he's clinging to their mutual appreciation of Breakfast at Tiffany's... except that she barely remembers the film and only "kinda liked it."
The even dumber part:And I said, "What about Breakfast at Tiffany's?
She said, "I think I remember the film
And as I recall, I think, we both kinda liked it."
And I said, "Well, that's the one thing we've got."
Basically, the guy just doesn't like to break up with women and he'd rather stay in a meaningless relationship than go through the break-up.So what now?
It's clear to see we're over
And I hate when things are over
When so much is left undone.
- The Swollen Goiter of God
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
I bet he likes piña coladas and getting caught in the rain.
- Dalty
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
Katy Perry is a goddess. End of.
Over here,there is bit of a standing joke about fucking Taylor Swift then not calling her just so the miserable old cow will write a song about you,
Over here,there is bit of a standing joke about fucking Taylor Swift then not calling her just so the miserable old cow will write a song about you,
- The Swollen Goiter of God
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
I'm willing to bet that's an international joke.
- Quasar
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
Bon Jovi - Who Says You Can't Go Home
"Who says you can't go home?
Why says you can't go back?
I been all around the world and as a matter of fact
There's only one place left I wanna go
Why says you can't go home?"
Well, going home and wanting to go home are 2 different things. Lots of people WANT to go home. That's why there's a saying about it.
"Who says you can't go home?
Why says you can't go back?
I been all around the world and as a matter of fact
There's only one place left I wanna go
Why says you can't go home?"
Well, going home and wanting to go home are 2 different things. Lots of people WANT to go home. That's why there's a saying about it.
- The Swollen Goiter of God
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
The sailors of the Sloop John B wanna go home.
- The Swollen Goiter of God
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
Thomas Wolfe says you can't go home again. James Joyce says you can never leave it.
- Dalty
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
James Joyce was terrible with a map.
- The Swollen Goiter of God
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Re: Dumb Lyrics
Ulysses would indicate otherwise.
- Mal Shot First
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