Huffy Flounce

I have my Star Wars lounge pants for the hospital tomorrow. Maybe I will take my Superman ones too. Just in case.

When you say "lounge pants," do you mean "lounge underwear"?

Just to confuse you, I don't.

I knew you guys were all full of shit--what with your "We only call them pants if they touch our junk!" claptrap. You knew what we meant by pants all along.

The sign on the packet says "Lounge Pants" so I am just recycling some other poor, misguided fools mistakes.

Your claptrap is still secure if you resolve to wear them without underwear. That way, they'd still be touching your junk.

I might want nothing near my junk, on medical grounds.

Be sure to put something on your junk before you leave the grounds, at least.

I'll be in a car. I have heated seats.

I have a way to heat my seat. It didn't come factory-installed, but it's free.

That leaves a mark.

That's why you wear the underwear.

Wait. Underwear, or pants? I can't keep up.

Maybe you need a belt. Or suspenders.

Do you guys have some funny name for suspenders, or do you just call them "suspenders"?

You call them "braces"? Well, then, what do you call braces?

We call them braces. Suspenders hold up stockings. We also call braces 'braces'. It's easy when you know how.

Hey, look! We got new badges!

We've cycled through three badges, and nobody else has even made it to the first one. If we were to reflect on this a little bit, it might make us feel a little pathetic.

Never gonna happen. Our patheticness knows no boundaries, and is only dwarfed by our desire to play this patheticness out in public.

I don't think "patheticness" is a real word. Maybe pathos is what you were looking for, but it only has two syllables and that's not enough for you crazy Brits.

I think pathos would be appropriate if Dalty had intended to say that he and Goits are known for their impassioned speeches appealing to their readers' emotions. Since he meant instead that they are pitiful losers (i.e., using the term pathetic in a colloquial sense), I'd argue that the neologism "patheticness" is also acceptable.

"Patheticness" gets some play. It depends on the dictionary.

"Pathos" carries a lot of baggage with it. A lot of the people reading it might take it to mean something Dalty doesn't mean it to mean.

Be strong, homes. How do the nurses dress in the UK?

Very proper and decent.