Huffy Flounce

Have her delivered to you quartered. Got it.

25% of Portman is better than no Portman at all.

Oh, you're getting 100% of her. It just won't all be connected.

Even better!

Bananarama's Bouncy Bits wrote:25% of Portman is better than no Portman at all.

Like her performance in Star Wars prequels!

Zing!

Current Non-Annoyance

Next week, I just discovered that I'll be here.

http://www.mallofamerica.com/events/view/739

So excited! My wrestling weekend will now be a three day wrestling weekend!

I want pictures and a blow by blow account of the weekend.

Done and done! Friday will be meeting Kane, Saturday will be Mick Foley's stand up comedy show, Sunday will be WWE Elimination Chamber. Been wanting to see a live wrestling show for...oh...25 years now. SO excited that it's getting this close to finally happening!!

Still trying to decide if I should get a wrestling T-shirt before the show and if so, which one though.

Kane's as pretty as we always assumed he was.

"Weighing in at more than 300 pounds"? Color me un-intimidated.

I recommend these shirts:

http://www.ebay.com/itm/British-Bulldog ... 0652220608

http://www.redbubble.com/people/wemarko ... o+t-shirts

http://www.oldschooltees.com/ProductDet ... MgodKEUA-Q

http://www.cafepress.com/gorgeousgeorgeenterprises

http://www.tshirtsiwant.com/product_inf ... ts_id=4119

I'd also recommend Judy Grable and Mildred Burke shirts, but I couldn't find any.

I went to a wrestling event right here in good ol' Iowa many, many years ago. Undertaker vs The Ultimate Warrior, and Jake the Snake vs The Earthquake.

Some low-grade professional wrestlers came to my high school when I was in seventh or eighth grade. Some of the headliners had names that were deceptively close to the names of famous wrestlers. I think the big match of the night was between a "Brett Harte" and a "Sean Michaels."

I went and had a pretty good time. Other big wrestling fans went and were quite upset by the whole affair. They felt like they'd been duped. I didn't feel bad for them. First of all, didn't the spelling give it away? (All right. We *were* in Alabama.) Secondly, did they honestly think the real dudes were going to come to Crossville, Alabama? It was a one-stoplight town with a population of fewer than 1,500. (It still is.)

I remember being slightly annoyed that the shtick of one of the wrestlers was that he was gay. He wore pink and would pin the other wrestler and try to kiss him. I was more annoyed by the people in the audience, most of whom were raging homophobes and some of whom walked out in disgust. The annoyance of the stereotypical representation of homosexuality was there, of course, but mostly I just wound up wanting to punch people in the audience.

Bending his opponent over and butt-fucking him tenderly, followed by throwing a fabulous dinner oarty, was a bit beyond the limit though.

They were surprisingly ok with that.

Everyone loves a dinner party.

What was for dinner? Meat Loaf!

(Wrong thread.)

Franknfurter.

Current Non-Annoyance:

http://www.mallofamerica.com/events/view/739

The happy, smiling picture of Kane in a suit side by side with that description of him remains just delightful.

Hahahaha. Classic. Looks like a particularly uncharming Life Assurance salesman.

What happened to his mask?

HR said it was inappropriate.

It was taken under.

I used to watch pro wrestling back in 1994... I'm pretty certain that I didn't follow it longer than a year. What I liked about it then was how flashy the characters were: it was basically a bunch of men in costumes pretending to beat the crap out of each other. I haven't kept up with wrestling at all, but it seems like it's moved away from some of the ridiculous costumes and personas (personae?). Most of the wrestlers are just buff guys in tight pants - there doesn't seem to be much variation in their looks. I guess even Kane had to get rid of his mask to get with the times.

I wonder if it would be preposterous to a ten-year-old watching wrestling these days to imagine a wrestler like Yokozuna competing in one of the major wrestling federations.